How to Read Your Date's Foot Kicking Body Language

How do you accurately read your date's body language? It's not that difficult if you are observant and trust your instincts rather than fall prey to verbal seduction tactics. Your date might be saying: "I really like your hair," while flicking a hand dismissively or suddenly developing a cough attack. Then you know your date is lying. Where is the attention, the focus? They may be sidetracked by the competition parading by. This hub gives some key points, advice and a video on what to look out for in assessing your date's body language before it is too late and you discover that you have to admit that you made the wrong choice.

Six Questions

The famous modern dance choreographer Martha Graham said: "The body can not lie". Instinctively we all converse in body language but being skilled at it requires some study. Yet because the language is inborn, even in animals, learning more about it is just a re-affirmation of what your subconscious already knows.

1. The Eyes. Concentrate on the eyes, where do they focus? Are they evasive, looking away or wide open, making friendly eye contact with you?

2. Direction. Which direction is your date facing? A are you sitting side by side, each facing your own way?

3. Openness. Is your date's posture and position open, welcoming, assertive and approachable or closed up, frightened and introvert?

4. Twitching. Does your date have involuntary twitches, like moving the feet and legs without being aware of it? Or chewing on the fingers or nails?

5. Honesty. Does the body language agree or contradict what the person is saying as in the politician who says: "We are giving the issue utmost priority!" sitting there cross-legged inadvertently kicking the issue away with one foot.

6. Compatibility. And finally, does the date synchronise with your own body language or do they move in opposition, against your position and movements?

PS: The worst crime: Answering their cell-phone at length in your presence!

You might believe that every person's body occupies the amount of space it needs from head to toe and as far as the limbs can reach. But it doesn`t stop there. Although that space is fixed by the size of your body and could be measured with a ruler, as soon as you begin to move and act, so your personal space also begins to change.

The area around the body we use when moving, breathing, speaking, shouting or jumping may project itself far beyond the limits of the physical body itself. It can change in size and density.

You may act big or small and you can, to a certain degree, control who or what enters or has an influence on your personal space. Expanding your personal space or "aura" involves energy coming from the gut: the whole body, heart and soul. The allure of great actors and the grace of dancers depend on this. You too can do it and grow from within to project your personality. To experience this for yourself practise the two extreems of your personal space. Then somewhere in between, your choice of application of this piece of awareness can be applied to every situation that is presented to you.

For example, when ever I have to stand in a crowded queue at the airport or in the bank I take a strong stance and expand my aura. It really helps keep the crowd at a respectable distance.Rather convenient, don't you think?

How to Read Your Date's Body Language

Language is communication. Body language is a two-way process. If your own aura is set to block out messages then however hard your date is trying, his or her messages won't come across. You, the receiving end, can learn how to be open and welcoming, how to throw off all unnecessary barriers in your own body language. Then your date's body language becomes a true and honest conversation.

Don't fake it. You can always tell when a politician or other public figure has been "trained" in good body language. With motionless hands, unblinking eyes and fast speaking lips, they come across as fake as people with plastic surgery. So verbalising and analysing body language too much is killing the goose that laid the golden egg. Better learn the basics and then trust your intuition and your instincts.

Respect dating etiquette by focusing on your date without distraction. Listen to what your partner is saying. When a thought pops up in your head, do not interrupt. Store your thought until they finish saying what they want to say and listen. Often the thought you had in mind is no longer relevant by the time your interlocutor has finished saying what hey want to say. Listening and timing is crucial in effectively interacting with a date. When not sure, keep your invisible smile.

Good Luck on your dates,

SUE ADAMS

Have YOU dated someone whose body language obviously contradicted their story?

The EasyFitness Series of hubs is where you can find out how to increase your physical intelligence, loose weight and get fit the sensible way. It's fun and interesting. Have a look.

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